It was a few weeks into my new singledom that my first date came along… and as much of my love life to date has started, it was through a mutual friend. This is where things start to get a little messy! I’d mentioned previously that I’ve a few friends in ‘alternative’ lifestyles. For the most part, this means that they are involved in polyamorous relationships. This basically means that they date more than one person, sometimes having a ‘primary’ partner, or the main squeeze, and dating other people on a less serious basis. This seems to work well for them and is in fact how my first date came to be. I had been spending a lot of time with a handful of friends, who’d been wonderful after the break-up, and one of them had recently started dating a very lovely girl, who it turns out, was mildly interested in me also.
Now I’ve dallied with kissing (and what not) the odd girl here and there in the past, but I’ve never been in a full-blown relationship with a girl. Partially because the opportunity has never arisen, but mainly because of all the long-term relationships I have been in! Anyhow, this very pretty girl was interested in me and, with some encouragement from my friend, asked me out on a date. My very first date of singledom involved a trip to Accents with possibly one of the most stunning women I have ever seen in my entire life. I also hadn’t ever really been on a date before in my life, so I had some major hurdles to overcome.
First step was to figure out what the hell I was going to wear, and to double and triple check that it was in fact a date and not just a meet up of friends for tea (I think I probably drove her slightly demented). I tried on so many different possible outfits that my poor bed was an absolute shambles by the time I was done (it did however prompt me to clear out my wardrobe, but that’s a tale for another day!). I eventually settled on a pretty fifties style dress that was dragged out from my wardrobe, whilst she was all pretty in a Lolita style dress. A right scene I’m sure we caused.
We had a lovely time, some lovely tea, and shared a couple of lovely cuddles. After a few hours, and a couple of hot chocolates, it was time for us to head on. I was surprisingly nervous saying goodbye, however she very nicely walked me to the nearest Luas, where we had a bit of a kiss, much to the absolute amusement and delight of a group of teenagers waiting on a luas. I was heading off down the country that evening, so to my utter joy and amazement (note the sarcasm) said gaggle of teenagers ended up on my luas and insisted on sitting almost on top of me whispering and pointing. All I could do was laugh! At least I’d given someone a thrill!
Anyhow, my lessons learned from my first date are;
- Dress in something that you feel good in, don’t dress to impress the person. If you are comfortable and happy in your own skin, that’s going to shine out way more than if you’re pulling down your skirt, up your top and toppling out of your shoes!
- Girls kiss better than boys (generally, but not always)
- There’s still some serious looks given to you when you walk through town hand in hand with a girl
- Tea/Coffee and chats works so well for a first date
- Going in for the kiss is advised.
And finally, if the date isn’t fun, then it wasn’t for you! I’ve learned this over the last few months, dating should, above anything else, be fun, and if you’re not enjoying it, then it’s with the wrong person. Don’t go on a second date if you weren’t in the position where you didn’t want the first one to end. A shorter post than normal, but in fairness, it’s a sweeter post than usual too! Back to normal reading levels next time… where we go on the first date that turns into something more…